I tried so hard

I try.

So.

Damn.

Hard.

 

I just want to be happy.

I have put a years worth of my life and love into a relationship that I feel crap in.

I get told to ‘appreciate the time we spend together’ and ‘why do you always want more’

He makes me feel guilty for wanting to spend more than 1-2 days together… Mind you they’re not full days.

He makes me feel guilty, like I’m taking time away for him and seeing me is a chore.

I don’t want to feel guilty anymore.

I want to be loved, by everything I do.

I want someone to want to spend time with me.

I want someone to accept their feeling of being tired, and want to be tired and do nothing with me.

I am sorry ___ that I am not who you want me to be. You keep saying you love me ‘more’ and ‘you’re perfect’ but obviously I’m not to you.

___________________________________

I saw a photo today, and it was a little girl in the rain, screaming her lungs out… that is all I want to do right now is just scream. SO FUCKING LOUD.

Wish me an my emotionally challenging relationship well.

 

 

 

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