Another guy, who is over me… what is wrong with me?
Every bloody guy gets over me in a week.
Honestly I’m getting sick of it, I feel like I must be a horrible person.
Watch and listen to the calming harmonies of these two music makers
First of all I’d like to say sorry to myself and who ever the hell might actually read the shit I write for not posting in a while… Life caught up
I had a pretty good summer worked for 2 months straight so that I could go to my beloved Kennett River for a month…Oh the peace and serenity, it really is another world out there for me. Mum was in spain for Christmas and New Years which was nice to have it on my own, had the best christmas ever whilst still not talking to David (father) and mum being in spain one of the most gorgeous and kindest of girls in the world and her boyfriend decided to take me in and share their wonderful families. I have never really felt apart of anything like it… After chrissy and new years I headed down the coast. The most amazing part of my life is being able to breath air that is a few hundred kms away from all my chaos. Coming back home was very hard…I’m finally moving out with a friend which will be a relief hopefully the space from mum might give us a better opportunity to become closer if that makes sense?
And now to the point… why my nails went through my hand… Oh boy the nerve of some people is beyond me. Today my ”father” got married…all pretty new to me found out on tuesday, then got a lovely insulting text message from him and then tonight well I got a beautifully fucked up message from the now ”step sister” that pretty much make me want to…god knows what but I was so closing to getting aggresive that I needed to breath but in doing that oops too much pressure on my hand…
Forgive me you fucked up family for not wanting to be apart of your fucked up little world but just LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE! I left for a reason one you still can’t see no matter how many times I tell you.
I am strong and know what I want. Guess what it’s not you.
If you want a happy ending, It depends on where you stop the story
Sorry for my absence once again…
But not a whole lot has changed…
Still not talking to a certain side of my ‘family’, still struggling with life, failing uni, torn between ideas and memories in my mind that I know I need to separate from what I want as reality…
People that come into my life, I feel sincerely sorry for.
For one I must be one of the most painful people to be around, which is why I will forever be alone with my untrusting self.
Please someone come save me